What Motherhood Really Is…. by Jessica Imperfect Momma Lately been having some thoughts on what I have learned as a mother. Nothing and yet so very much. One big thing is: I am learning (again) that it is ok…to be imperfect. I am just gonna be me. What a freaking hard lesson to learn. Anyhow, I know I wrote...
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by Sarah @ The Crazy Baby Mama We saw the Romantic Comedies. We read the books. And here’s the stuff they left out: THE FIRST TRIMESTER: – You’ll probably develop carpel tunnel syndrome from spending over an hour a day on Google trying to figure out if those niggling pains in your pelvic area that you’ve been feeling for...
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by Nancy @ Normalarkey Hi! I’m your neighbor from a few blocks down the street, but I don’t think you know me by name. I’m the one who flees into my house whenever you and your large black Doberman Pinscher with the improbably feminine name of Clarice are trotting by on your thrice daily walk, accompanied by your Segway-riding...
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by Jason @ Teaching Fourth Share The afternoon sun blistered down from a nearly cloud-barren sky as I drove the neighborhoods around my school. Upon reaching the first designated address, I stepped from my weakly air-conditioned vehicle into the sweltering summer heat. It was time for home visits. Now, undoubtedly some of you are wondering just what home visits...
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by Sherri @ Old Tweener Editor’s note: While I myself have not succumbed to the lure of this particular vehicle (sometimes referred to as a “Swagger Wagon”) it has come to my attention that there is a certain line of thinking that most moms must go through in order to purchase their first one…….and yet I will continue to...
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by Moog @ Mental Poo I’ve tried. I’ve tried to make Mario Lopez ugly and I can’t. Every time I see this guy on TV I’m like, “DAMN, dude..you’re making me look like SHIT” which is – admittedly – tough to do because I’m kind of a specimen. So I then come in to work and do what every...
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by RawkinRobyn @ Life by Chocolate Everyone deserves a little loving during the holidays, right? Not really. Taken directly from current internet dating ads, here are reasons #51-55 for my choice to maintain a celibate existence into 2011. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ REASON #51: how do you know Santa is a man? he shows up late, he eats your cookie, he empty’s his sack, he comes...
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by KLZ @ Taming Insanity If you’re crazy, how do you know? I’m not being tongue in cheek, I’ve genuinely been pondering this for years. If you were say, Moses, and a bush burst into flames, speaking to you and claiming to speak God’s words, what would you think? I? Would likely immediately assume I was nuts. I’m not...
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by Mandoodle@ Mandoodle < classid=”clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000″ width=”560″ height=”340″ codebase=”http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0″> Blog this!Bookmark on DeliciousDigg this postRecommend on FacebookShare on Linkedinshare via RedditShare with StumblersTweet about itBuzz it upSubscribe to the comments on this post
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by Lol @ Lolais40 Sometimes, people don’t follow the rules. I’m not talking about crossing the street against the light, or stealing someone’s credit card information. I’m talking about SOCIAL rules. Those little niceties that were put into place so that mankind wouldn’t go all “Lord of the Flies” on each other. Yesterday, I met someone for lunch. We...
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by Eva @ Wrestling with Retirement This post is not for children. They deserve to hang on to happy endings for as long as they are able. For the adults out there, however, it’s time to give up the fantasy world and face reality. All those fairy tales we read as kids? Lies, all lies. Well, at least those...
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by The Coach @ My Views From the Edge The Coach on the Edge is holding six items or less. Can pestilences, calamities, famines, and earthquakes be far behind? There is a site called Six Items or Less: a global experiment examining the power of what we don’t wear. Now, to me, this sounds like a communist plot against...
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The Cookie by Avery Rose @ Strike That When I moved to California, I only visited my mom and step-dad once a year. You’d think that would be enough to keep them fresh in my mind, but apparently not. One year, during one of my visits, we decided to drive into Brooklyn to visit family. Of course, being Italian,...
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by Moog @Mental Poo The following is a true story of something that happened to me on an airplane. I really, really, really wish it wasn’t. But then again…this is pretty much how my friggin’ life goes. God hates me so much. (click to enlarge images) THE SCENE: I’m sitting in my seat on the plane…when just then… Alas,...
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by Sarah @ So What Else Dear 16 year-old Sarah, Stop looking at me with such disdain. I’m you 24 years into the future. What’s that? No, I’m not sixty. It’s a relatively simple math problem and either you’re really bad at math, or you’re just a little bitch. (it’s both) Leave me alone and listen for five minutes! I’ve come...
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by Sherilin @ Laughing My Abs Off today i got confirmation for a trip that i’ll be making soon. brooke & i will be flying and it will be her first time on a plane. all this thinking about flying has brought to mind my last trip by air… it was 5 years ago and i was headed from nc...
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by Kathleen @ Brutalism I know some people who distinctly remember their loss of innocence as the time when they found out that Santa Claus was not real, or when a beloved pet died, or when they learned that “no new taxes” means “I’m a liar, liar pants on fire.” I remember my own loss of innocence like it was...
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by Tina@ Three In the Bed We all have seen them, most of us know some; they live in our neighborhood, come to the playgroups and of course can always be found at the gym - skinny moms. They nearly run you over with their three across jogging strollers, whizzing by on Saturday mornings, two days home from the...
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by Tom @ Sophisticated Lunacy. The other day I went to the pet store to get some supplies. As I unloaded my cart of dog toys, dog treats and a 20 lb. bag of dry dog food onto the checkout counter, the cashier looked at me and asked me if I owned a dog. I fought the urge to...
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by Jill @ Yeah. Good Times. Oh, don’t look so shocked….. Edit: I didn’t find this one anywhere, I made it myself Blog this!Bookmark on DeliciousDigg this postRecommend on FacebookShare on Linkedinshare via RedditShare with StumblersTweet about itBuzz it upSubscribe to the comments on this post
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by Yuliya @ She Suggests (Disclaimer: this is meant to amuse, so don’t lose your cool, defuse!) Babywearing Weary Back- lower back and/or shoulder pain inflicted by wearing baby. Can be exacerbated by vacuuming whole house while wearing said baby. Remedies involve elaborate favor trade-in system and/or blackmailing of child rearing partner (ie you hold baby while I shower and I...
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by Sarah @ The Crazy baby Mama DISCLAIMER: Hi Dad. Instead of reading this post, why don’t you check out www.funwithtrains.com. Love, Your Daughter I went back to Dr. Bashani’s today for my official postpartum checkup — you know, the one where your partner gets the green light to hit that, and you discuss your birth control options with...
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by Kelley@ Kelley’s Break Room Although I would never step into a closet with a tightly sealed, impossible-to-open door with a disheveled stranger that I’ve known for 0 seconds, I essentially do this every time I step into an elevator, like most of us. It’s the oddest thing, but that disheveled man is in every elevator I ride… Hmmm… Did I mention that...
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by Sarah @ So..What Else..? I came home today and when I opened the door to the house I got a faint whiff of basement mildew and the first thing I thought of (fondly) was my teenage boyfriend, Jake, because he always had a slight case of mildew smelling body odor and back then I was so in love...
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by Natalie @ Awkward Sex and the City You’ve been given many “looks” over the years, haven’t you? Some good; some bad; some made you cry in the corner of your bathtub (gentlemen), but the truth is, that’s life. We all get those looks from friends/strangers/DMV workers, so to make you feel a little less repulsed about yourself, I...
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by Allessandra @ 18 Steps to Happiness Course’s theme: to become as intelligent as a woman (that is, to be perfect). Pedagogical objective: training course that allows men to develop that part of the brain of which they ignore the existence. Program: 4 modules of which one required Module 1: Basic Course, Mandatory 1. Learning to live without the...
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by Bluzdude@ Darwinfish 2 I used to be married. I don’t spend too much time dwelling on it any more, now 13 years in the past, and mainly remember the good parts. This story was definitely a good part… for me, anyway, because it’s been one of my story-telling staples ever since it happened. I was at work one...
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by Tom @ Sophisticated Lunacy Everyday it’s the same. I open up my email and there, amongst the job leads, college correspondence and bloggy stuff, is a crapload of junk e-mails commonly known as spam. Now ordinarily I get about a half dozen Nigerian scams, phishing scams, and the typical ads about credit scores, air fares, technical schools, ink...
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by Ross @ Ross Cavins dot com I remember when the Mandals craze began. At least I remember when it crept upon my family and took my dad hostage in its thorny little grip. It was the year 2000. Many remember that fateful year as the year that planes were supposed to fall from the sky, the year the...
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by Sarah @ The Crazy Baby Mama DISCLAIMER: Dear Dad — If you somehow manage to stumble on this story, I suggest you check out http://www.funwithtrains.com/ instead. Thank you. Love, Your Daughter. Anyway, ladies, I may have some bad news: While having sex during pregnancy is generally fine, using a vibrator may be a little more risky. While it’s...
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by Kady@ A Lady Reveals Nothing Well – I went deep sea fishing. At first, I didn’t care if I went or not, since I had already been. I’m a try-something-once-and-then-check-it-off-your-list person. But I’m also a go-with-what-everybody-else-wants-to-do person, and so I didn’t veto the idea. We set out from our hotel quite early, therefore I didn’t have time to...
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by Kelley @ Kelley’s Break Room Today I went to eat at a hibachi grill with my family. We watched in awe as the cook (HEY!! He’s not JAPANESE!!!!!) made flaming onion towers, chopchopchopchopchopcho up eggs, did a little dance with his spatula, pulled little rice pranks on a disinterested teenager and gave me one too many pieces of...
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by Erin @ The Mother Load Admittedly we all have our hangups. Some of us focus on one, while others (like yours truly) obsess daily over several. Fortunately my biggest problem was my honkin’ Jewish rather large nose. Being called “Witch Nose” in elementary school & junior high was no picnic, let me tell you. But it was nothing short of...
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by Sandie @ Quirkyloon Enchiladas. We hardly knew ye. Nothing puts more fear into my husband’s heart than when he asks, “What’s for dinner?” and I reply with a smile, “I experimented.” “Oh nooooo, do you mean…are you saying…that you m-made….enchiladas?” My husband asks hesitantly and with a look of fear and trepidation.“Oh yes.” I reply with a twinkle...
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by Kathleen @ Brutalism It was a weird weekend. And not just because I spent part of it sitting in a room full of strangers wearing Saran Wrap underpants. Or as I like to call it…Saturday. Perhaps I should explain… For a few years now, I’ve been thinking about getting laser hair removal for my most intimate of areas……..my...
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